How to boost your Self-Esteem


One important approach in counselling therapy to help clients to achieve a high level of self-esteem and positive self-view is Humanistic therapy.  Carl Rogers (1951) 'father's of humanistic theory', agreed that for a person to "grow", they need an environment that provides them with genuineness (openness and self-disclosure), acceptance (being seen with unconditional positive regard), and empathy (being listened to and understood).



Without these, relationships and healthy personalities will not develop as they should, much like a tree will not grow without sunlight and water.

Rogers believed that every person could achieve their goals, wishes, and desires in life. When, or rather if they did so, self-actualization took place.  This was one of Carl Rogers most important contributions to psychology, and for a person to reach their potential a number of factors must be satisfied.

Carl Rogers (1959) believed that humans have one basic motive, that is the tendency to self-actualize - i.e., to fulfil one's potential and achieve the highest level of 'human-beingness' we can.  Like a flower that will grow to its full potential if the conditions are right, but which is constrained by its environment, so people will flourish and reach their potential if their environment is good enough.

However, unlike a flower, the potential of the individual human is unique, and we are meant to develop in different ways according to our personality.  Rogers believed that people are inherently good and creative.  They become destructive only when a poor self-concept or external constraints override the valuing process.  Carl Rogers believed that for a person to achieve self-actualization they must be in a state of congruence (present).


This means that self-actualization occurs when a person’s “ideal self” (i.e., who they would like to be) is congruent with their actual behaviour (self-image or concept).  Rogers describes an individual who is actualizing as a fully functioning person. The main determinant of whether we will become self-actualized is childhood experience.
Carl Rogers (1951) viewed the child as having two basic needs: positive regard from other people and self-worth. 

                                                     
Therefore, how we think about ourselves, our feelings of self-worth are of fundamental importance both to psychological health and to the likelihood that we can achieve goals and ambitions in life and achieve self-actualization.

"Self-worth may be seen as a continuum from very hight to very low.  A person who has high self-worth, that is, has confidence and positive feelings about him or her self, faces challenges in life, accepts failure and unhappiness at times, and is open to people."

"A person with low self-worth may avoid challenges in life, not accept that life can be painful and unhappy at times and will be defensive and guarded with other people. "

In order to build your self-esteem and gain conditions of self-worth is highly recommended some self-help reading.



Source:
www simplypsychology.org


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